Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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Dan O'Driscoll

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

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i heart wiener

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your mom is so old that she farts dust.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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A simple math problem. If 10% of men are gay, and 20% of men are chinese what is the probability that a man chosen at random spends his free time and meal time both on his knees?

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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Water, please.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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but there is a road to the super market

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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