What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

hi

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

What's your name? You tell me.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

women's rights

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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