Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

the chicken whent boomand then died

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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