How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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Dan O'Driscoll

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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If i was a chicken i would probably not be on this site. But i am, so you can all suck it!!!! BAHHHH i'm a frog EJ

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What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

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Knock Knock Whos there? Its dad mom died....

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Hello I'm a fat kid

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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Hummer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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Why does Justin Beiber's asswhole hurt, and his father's dick was brown? Because he ate mexican food and his on his dad's dick.

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Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops