What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

What's gay and gay? Joe

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

i wish i was a tree !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...