A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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no u

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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What did the mushroom jock say to the mushroom nerd? your and ugly wimpy mushroom....and i am on steroids

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

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jewish people like other jewish people.

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How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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