Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? One crawling out of the bottom licking its lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

jess is a drama queen am i right rishi ?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I am a real homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the bunny eat his food

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the cow lay down? Because he was tired

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops