What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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A bar walks into your mother.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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What's the difference between a black man with a pie and an asian with an apple. They're of different ethnicitiesand cultures, and are holding different foods.

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Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

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69

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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