Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

derp

Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

Why doesn't the mexican have a job? Grad school is taking up too much of his time.

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is very bad looking

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

High school gym class.

What's funny about my gay friend? He is a stand-up comedian.

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

want to no whats funny what your mom

Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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