What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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women's rights

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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Go away.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

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Black people are clen.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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like my drawing of a white person?

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops