What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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the blonde choked o a gummy bear. What happened next? she went to the hospital

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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penis

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Obama.

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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What's one thing a black man can't have? White skin

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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I don't get it

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What comes after "Q" R

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

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What rhymes with turtle? Rape

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what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

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there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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