How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

why did the chicken cross the road.

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Non-believers.

why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

How Long is a Chinese man.

What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

Knock knock Come in!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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