What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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Sea World Japan.

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knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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Real jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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