Penis jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock-knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. I'm calling the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. He says ow

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

thumb_up thumb_down -1

God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My butt!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats young and never moved? still born baby

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

96

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a muslim walks in to a bar... there were no survivors

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops