Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

My butt!!!!

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

Y2K

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

Why do Kenyans run so much? Because they like it.

So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

Lebron Traveled

Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Women's rights.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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