dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

what did the man say to the other man? hi

Golf.

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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