"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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A Black man walks out of a KFC.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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this website...

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm deaf. I'm deaf who? What?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops