why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

I don't get it

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Q:Waht did the blind deaf kid get for chrismas? A: Cancer

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

what's better than animal crackers? your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...