Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

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whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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Noah is Smart.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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That's what he said.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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