What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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knock knock you may come in

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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What lives underground? Grandpa

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How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Whats the best thing that happened to the jews The Holocaust

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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