When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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A black goes to college

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Chuck Norris died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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