God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

Men's rights.

Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

Benevolent villain.

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

if it's friday, it must be China

why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

Y2K

Why is he called Donald Trump? Because he trumps a lot...

A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

what do you get when you throw a refrigerator at a boy on a bike? a severely injured boy, a lawsuit , a police record and a prison mate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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