What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

Billy: Mom.... Dad, I have decided that I want to live on my own. Parents: Great son! We're so proud of you! Billy: Thanks for your support! Your luggage is outside by the taxi.

A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

Justin Bieber

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

Baseball

Whoa! A talking carrot!

Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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