What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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George W. Bush

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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