Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

I can't think of a joke!

How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

Yo momma's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror she decided to get plastic surgery.

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

your face.

What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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