How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down +1

professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I was in the grocery store on a sunday afternoon, and i saw a black man. To my surprise, HE DIDN'T BUY ANY FRIED CHICKEN?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops