Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

A man walks into a bar.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

Dan O'Driscoll

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

yo momma is so tall shes tall

Where else? The junk yard

What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

but there is a road to the super market

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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