An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

Adam Sandler.

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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