guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

thumb_up thumb_down +33

If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops