Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

(insert Anti-Joke here)

what did the black man do for his family? nothing

why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

Pirate ships are used by pirates.

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

http://www.ladsta.com

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...