How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

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I LIKE TURLES.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops