whats red white and blue? i dont know

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't because it got hit by a car.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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