A horse walks into a bar...n

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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21

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Knock Knock Good one...

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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Q: why do the Toronto maple leafs suck? A: they dont they r in seventh place biotch!

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A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

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What do you call a female duck? A duck.

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

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whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops