Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

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Why Did The Girl Fall Off The Swing. IDK maybe she fell asleep.

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

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Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

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say it aloud and fast: •im sofa king stew ped •ice bank mice elf •alpha Q •mike hunt •mike ock

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Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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whats bonged in and looks like milk? harry after some cani

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What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

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What did the anti-joke say to the joke? Your fly is down.

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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