suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

What's 1+1? 4.

A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

whats round and like a ball a ball

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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