What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

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Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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