A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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what did the duck say to the dog. quack

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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drugs.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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