A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

this website...

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

fart

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Knock Knock. Go away!

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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