do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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What's brown, hairy and goes up and down? A kiwifruit in an elevator.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? An arsonist who happens to be a forest ranger.

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how does peploe get around they walk

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hahaha

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

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A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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