Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

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So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see his mother before she passed away of terminal cancer

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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what did the man say to the other man? hi

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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haha.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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69

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops