A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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