Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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You're so straight!

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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no

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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The geese of Growmore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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