a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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Where else? The junk yard

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

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When I went on this website for the first time with a few friends, I was surprised to see a lot of these jokes were actually capable of making me laugh. But as I read on, eventually those funny, harmless jokes turned into offensive, ignorant, and very absurd statements. I realize that this 'anti joke' website was most likely created by a bunch of white people, because obviously white people are one of the most racest human beings, but all this is just too much! I guess I'm trying to say: if your going to make a joke, be respectful about it. America has gone through a lot of unforgiveable hardships and unfortunately these 'jokes' are making fun of all of that in a very offensive way.

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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69

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

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A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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