two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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SPAMS!!!

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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Noah is Smart.

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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