Why did the cow lay down? Because he was tired

3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

. Deez nuts Ok

What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

The outside of my house is painted yellow.

you are gay

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

want to go home? yea

Bing

Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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