*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

why do black people like basketball? because it envolves running shooting and stealing

Women's rights

Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

why is there a hole in the wall, i hope a prehistoric mole doesnt come out of that hole in the ball CC

john liked the paper........ so he took it

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

Knock Knock. F uck off.

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

why did the kid kill himslelf? he was bullied.

Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

Why were corners made? For crying.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

Rebecca Black sings a song.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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