What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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Women's rights

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An elephant walks into a bar. Except not really, it couldn't fit through the door.

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops