what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why do black people like basketball? because it envolves running shooting and stealing

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock. F uck off.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

God is religiously proven to be real

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

thumb_up thumb_down +9

yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's brown a sticky? -A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops