There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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A fish walks into a bar

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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minorities

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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