Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

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Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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Turtles

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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black people. that is all...

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the dentist? A: Because he was dying of brain cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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