what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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Knock Knock Good one...

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Chuck Norris died.

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penis

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Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bunge cord? My ass!

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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Punchline.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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What's brown a sticky? -A stick

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A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

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Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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