I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

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Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

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jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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I love boobs

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What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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justin littleton. nuff said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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